How to call out disrespect without sounding defensive like a leader, not a manager
It’s Tactical Tuesday!
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The Thought
Did you know…
most conflicts escalate not because of disrespect, but because leaders react emotionally instead of responding intentionally?
When leaders slow the moment down, they keep control of the conversation - and protect trust at the same time.
Disrespect doesn’t require defensiveness.
It requires clarity.
Quote:
“Power struggles begin when leaders match emotion instead of setting direction.” – Unknown
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The Tip
Remember to…
1. Slow down the moment
A manager reacts:
“Don’t talk to me like that.”
A leader pauses:
“Let’s slow this down. The tone here isn’t helping us get anywhere.”
Lowering your tone prevents a power struggle and keeps the conversation productive.
2. Name the behavior, not the attitude
Labels like disrespectful or negative shut people down.
Behaviors open the door to change.
Say:
“When you interrupt and dismiss ideas, it shuts down the conversation.”
Then ask:
“Do you see how that affected others in the room?”
Behaviors are fixable.
Labels are not.
3. Set expectations for how you’ll work together moving forward
A manager warns:
“This better not happen again.”
A leader aligns:
“We can disagree — but we’re going to speak to each other with respect.”
Then co-create:
“What’s a better way for us to handle disagreements next time?”
Leaders don’t defend themselves.
They set the standard — and build shared commitments around it.
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The Tool
Short Video:
Learn how to address disrespect calmly and confidently — without escalating tension or losing credibility.
See how leaders pause the moment, clarify behavior, and reset expectations with clarity and care.
Watch the viral video on TikTok
Watch this video & read the post on LinkedIn
Or watch other CLA videos here: YouTube or Facebook
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Leadership Question of the week…
Here is the top question this week from our 200+ Leadership Questions (part of our Complete Leader Package. Don’t have these? Get instant access here.
❓What small wins have you (or we) accomplished recently that might have gone unnoticed?
❓How can we celebrate and build on them?
❓How can these wins help us achieve big goals?
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Activity of the week…
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Thank you for leading like a coach out there!
-Dwight
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