Happiness can feel elusive. We chase it, sometimes desperately, but it can seem like a distant mirage out there in the desert. But today, let's take a deep breath and step out of the desert and stop chasing and instead, let's talk about discovering and nurturing happiness within ourselves, even when things get tough.
First, remember happiness isn't that perfect picture on social media. It’s not a one-size fits all outfit. It’s a tailored suit. It’s your genuine joy, sense of peace, that unique spark that lights you up. Even if you’ve forgotten what that feels like it’s time to ask yourself, what makes you truly happy? Is it being outside in the open air, sitting quietly with a book, creating something special, sharing a smile and laughs with friends and family? Finding your "happy haven," or your “happy why,” is often the first step to unlocking your happiness even when you can’t see the road ahead.
But what if you're still searching for what makes you happy? No worries! Happiness often hides in everyday moments. One of the easiest ways we can uncover our happiness is to practice gratitude: maybe you get up early and take in the sunrise, perhaps you appreciate a friend's laughter, or celebrate a small victory. The simple fact of listening to this right here, right now, is a win. Remember, as Maya Angelou said, "Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow." So start there and remember happiness isn’t automatic, it’s cultivated and being actively grateful for what we have now, is a great way to nurture it every day.
But let’s be honest, life throws curveballs, and sometimes happiness feels like a memory we’ll never get back. But even in the midst of storms, we can shift our mindset. A 2022 study in Nature Human Behaviour found that people who actively practiced something called "positive reframing," looking for the silver lining in challenges, experienced increased happiness and resilience.
So, the next time the clouds gather, try this: challenge your negative thoughts. Are they true? Helpful? Instead, focus on what you can control, retell that negative story in a positive way. Reframe it. Then add in gratitude for even the small things, and remind yourself of past times you overcame obstacles. Viktor Frankl (a survivor of the concentration camps during the Holocaust) wrote, "Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – to choose one's attitude in any given circumstance."
It’s hard, but doable. It is possible for you to find and cultivate true happiness. So go out there and find and focus on your "happy haven," practice gratitude, and challenge your negative thoughts with positive reframing. Your happy life isn’t out of reach, it’s right in front of you.
Remember, you have the power to shape your destiny so go out there and make it happen.